S19 - Match Day 5

[equilibri]

@Equilibri: You have a uniqe player. How has Corplk been able to play only one match, have only one CAS but still have 4 SPP?

/hakos

I have nooooo clue, really... :D Well, a linerat that soon will be kicked (or die) doesn't really matter anyway... ;-)

[J-Reedy]

Diary of a roadie

Stool of a day today was I tell you. We had a gig at those weeeeird dark elves where they set up the stage and Blood Bowl field on that giant slab held up by four giant elephants. And I tell I have sneaky suspicion there's something under those elephants 'cause I have a keen sense of movement due to all those years I spent with Rolling Tomb Stones watching that base player of theirs just standing there without moving an inch. You see, I was tasked with watching him for signs of any body movement because that was a sign that he was going to keel over. Bunch of mummies those guys but boy could they rock. Anyways, that honed my sense of movement to such a heights that I can feel even a flutter of lawyer's conscience and I swear to you that that giant elephant carried slab was moving, slowly though, but definitely moving.

And don't even get me started with those elf players... If they even were elves – there was this one guy who was height of a dwarf and could be smelled before seen, another guy who kept claiming he was an adopted dwarf, a... thing... that looked like a... luggage. Then to top it of, there were the witch elves... I mean when an average guy like me goes to see darkie elves play a match of BB, he expects to see some skin and some extra-titulating moves from scantly clad witch elves. I mean when you picture a witch elf, you think of tall, long-legged, slender, dark-skinned elf beauty smiling mischievously. Well, we got the tall and skinny with the first witch but beauty... let's just say that she must be smartest creature on earth 'cause as my mother used to say, you either get a bit of beaty and bit of smarts or just whole load of one and not a drop of other. As to the smile... well she did get that grin when she smacked Hairyson flat on the field but to call it a smile would be same as calling knife in a back a friendly pat. Then there was that second witch... I must admit that there was something vexingly sexy about her... maybe because she had enough of material in her to make a half a dozen witch elfs.

Well, the talent did poorly on the field, we got beat by a lone TD, but I don't blame them or the muscle. There was no catching that one elf runner of theirs, Rincefart of something like that, when he saw that someone was running after him, it seemed he got extra pair of legs. And the elves did have unusually strong hitters, like that one ancient looking elf who smoked cigars all the time and kept ordering other blitzer elves around. And the most annoying player they had was that claiming-to-be-a-dwarf guy who kept hitting our muscle down with an ease of a veteran thug stealing a candy from a deaf-mute cripple and then apologizing after every hit. So we sucked at the game last time but rocked the gig. Not such a feat, I confess, these dark ones know how to party and love to show what they know. But Sarge had also a designed a set that was sure to get the elves going, talent opened with Oh! Darkling!, closed with Babies in Black and da'popped bejeezus out of those elvettes in the middle.

This time the set was no different, cracy grooving and lots of dark flesh flashing all around. All this even though I heard that they were in mourning and all of them elfies were going around with a black ribbon around their arm. Asked one of them about it, said that their creator of their city had died recently, didn't want to bother them more but I wonder how come someone so powerful that he can create a whole city full of wonders die. But that mourning period sure did nothing to defrenzify the crowd during the gig. Even saw those two witch elves in the crowd, the tall and lanky was looking at our show disapprovingly and seemed to freeze everyone around her to a nervous standstill but at least that busty stout one seemed to be enjoying herself hugging everyone around her and jugging down what I was team from that pot she carried around. Turned out it must've been something stronger judging by the size of the flames that shot out of the pot when she dropped her pipe there while somersaulting to the beat of Helter Skelter. That bugger of a buns salesman was also there. This time I made sure to keep him away from our muscle, Madman and Mustard go crazy for pies and last time that geezer sold them dozen pies per bob. Don't know what was in those pies but I'm just lucky I wasn't responsible for cleaning the stadium toilets. I mean the sound of those pies escaping from Madsy and Mustard was heard in the next kingdom I swear.

Even the match went better after the gig. Bit of a grind, we hit our heads – and fists, elbows, teeth, chest, arms and legs – everything we had against the elvish wall that wouldn't budge, they'd just dodge away and moved a bit further to take another onslaught from us. Muscle was soft today, no elf got hurt in the first but the bugger of elfs hurt Star badly and knocked out McGargnagey. We tried to get Lennyn loose for a pass play, but one of those blasted witch elfs took him down. No score and to the second half we went. Sarge got a smashing kick, the ball flew right into the corner so the elfies had a long way to go. Then McGargnagey took down that cigar smoking geezer. Smashed his hip, must've been bit fragile being such an old guy. Then Joko Ono hit one of the buggers when he was trying to dodge away from her and we had an opening. We got pressure on the ball-carrier on the flank but he managed to hand-off the ball to another elf but surpisingly he fell down when trying to dodge away. And then it was a mad tossle for the ball from then onwards. Sarge got the ball, lost the ball, efs got the ball and then lost the ball. Sarge got the ball again but the elfs formed that meat wall of theirs again and we couldn't go anywhere. Lennyn tried to run for a pass opportunity again, but guess who was there again? Yep, one of the witches. So no scoring on the field but I can assure you that talent did score a few after the post-game gig.

Next stop is going to be cheesy, we're visiting that skaven cheese kingdom. That's going to be a shite-smelling cheesy day, I tell you.


Well, never imagined an all zeros game against the elfs. TGA played stellar elf defence in the first half and as he didn't fail a dodge and I couldn't get anybody out, scoring opportunity in the last turn was up to a lone blitzer who promptly got knocked down. Second half I got one of the elf blitzers out in the first turn and then TGA failed a dodge (with a dodger) which opened up the field for me. At this point TGA had some connection issues and there was a turn where he had to play half of his turn in less than 30 secs. Result was a ball-carrier failing a dodge. From then on, it was bit of the wrestle for the ball until my +st thrower got the ball in middle of guarding orcs. No time to get to the endzone and then a lone blitzer running for the goal for a pass opportunity once again was brought down. Very good defensive game from TGA, shame about that one turn, might've been a different result.

[tags]

Superb report J-R :)

Stunning to see not just one, but two 0-0 matches in one NUL MD. When was the last time that happened?

[J-Reedy]

@Equilibri: You have a uniqe player. How has Corplk been able to play only one match, have only one CAS but still have 4 SPP?

I have nooooo clue, really... :D Well, a linerat that soon will be kicked (or die) doesn't really matter anyway... ;-)

I was thinking, could this be a freebooter that has been bought into team after the match? Maybe because he scored spp? Could be that the game doesn't process those kind of guys correctly when it comes to games played.

[hakos]

@Equilibri: You have a uniqe player. How has Corplk been able to play only one match, have only one CAS but still have 4 SPP?

I have nooooo clue, really... :D Well, a linerat that soon will be kicked (or die) doesn't really matter anyway... ;-)

I was thinking, could this be a freebooter that has been bought into team after the match? Maybe because he scored spp? Could be that the game doesn't process those kind of guys correctly when it comes to games played.

Yes, that would be my guess currently as well. Was hoping that equi could confirm that he bought him when he was a loner.

Good match report as usual. Interesting that snotlings still are the only one to score against you. I sense a challenge for the high elfs in the near future...

/hakos