S17 - Match Day 2

Started by J-Reedy, September 08, 2014, 10:39:48 AM

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J-Reedy



- WELLCOME DEAR LISTENERS! I'm Gron Grumbundy and this is BLOOD SPORTS SPOTLIGHT - THE magicast for all you folks interested in NORSCA UNION LEAGUE! Today we'll do a recap of the first match week of the new NUL Season. I also have a special treat for you! We're joined by the famous Blood Bowl recearcher, professor I.P. Buckets! Welcome, dear professor!
- Hmmh. I assure you gron, I'm not a professor of deeralogy, I know nothing of deers as I got my doctorships from Blood Bowlalogism and Massacresmith. Although, I've studied antlers a bit, to get a better understanding of the advantages that horned players have on the field.
- Yes, and it's just that interesting combination of different fields of study that have made you so popular! The way you combine the art of massacre in you Blood Bowl analysis really interestingly! I mean a Blood Bowl enthusiastic can not be considered a true connessoir of the game until he has read your masterpieces, The Analysis of Gutting Process of Lustrian Lizard Hunters and The Big Book of Big Guy Bashing Prowess. Once more, professor, thank you for joining us, I'm truly inspired.
- Well, thank you Gron. I must first say that this first match week of NUL or league 178 as it goes in my analysis - you see, I track over 200 Blood Bowl leagues - seemed even more violent than usually, the casually average was really high compered to the mean number of 2,6 casualties per match that is to be expected.
- Oh yes, professor, that was just one of the issues I wanted to bring up! We had quite a start for the season when the last season's finalist team Da Freeboooterz whupped the underworld's pride Warpstone Plumbers 2 to 1 in touchdowns. Nothing special about that, but the casualties! Eight of them!
- What? Off what?
- What?
- You said someone ate off something? Well, can't really say about that not knowing enough about the food vendors at the Underworld Arena, but I'm guessing the most popular food for consumption down there would be rats. Only one of the reasons why there's so usually much tension between the skavens and goblins of underworld teams. But enough of the food, don't know why you brought that up. You also mentioned casualties, Gron. This match had the biggest discrepancy between the casualties scored by teams, as the orcs managed to injure 8 players of the skaven-goblins while none of the orcs were casualtied. I think that this was mostly due to the insight that the orcs have on goblin anatomy and I'm not sure, but I think that the new orc player of the Freeboooters might have underworld origins, so it's only natural that he would know how to hurt the skavens, as witnessed by that magnificent foul that he laid on Lesuk the skaven blitzer. Very inspired and entertaining performance, using steel-toed boots of the prone player as a weapon - classical goblin play matter of fact, first the goblin nicks something sharp from the victim and then smashes him in the head with it.
- Ahem, yes, as you brought up goblins, let's continue with the second match of the week, Zlluga Boys going against Fantasy Armor Inc. Another 2-1 result there with the norse side getting the win but many were surprised as the casualties were split 3-3. What's your opinion about that big but, professor?
- Interesting nickname for Finnjävle, haven't heard that before, but I guess that's accurate, he does have quite a big butt, when compared to average norse size. Yes, Fantasy Armor's Big Butt wasn't up to his high standards, only managing one injury and then getting injured himself later in the match. This was a classical example of a that how one player can make a difference, Gritkrot the Fanatic was on fire - not literally of course, that would be silly, ligthting oneself on fire, doesn't work unless you have some demon blood, although I must confess that the halfling team Baker Boys of Baker Street Bakery were quite succesfull that season when they carried those portable charcoal grills on their backs and cooked meat pies on them during game, kept their casualty rate down quite effectively as they tossed the meat pies to the jaws of all ogres and trolls that tried to eat them, yes, I must admit that the fire aspect worked there but I also must stress that they didn't light themselves on fire. Yes, fine play with the ball and chain!
- What an insight! So if I understand you correctly, you dont' think that this was a catastrophy game for the norse side?
- Don't be silly! They don't hand out trophies in the regular season games! And there's no trophy that features a feline's backside! The closest thing to such trophy would be the Squig's Snothole that is given out in the Lakeland League to the most hated player of the league. But no cat butts, I assure you!
- ...ahmm, all right... WELL! Let's take a look at the third game of the week where the Mad Science Fair proved that little chaos triumps over your ordinary dwarf tactics. In search of snow white had hired Morg for the game but he was knocked out early so the vanilla dwarfs were left under-dwarfed and under-strength for most of the match while the chaos folk by all reports had a phenomenal blocking day. Touchdowns 2 to 0 and casualties 3 against 2. And let's talks the fourth match also at this point - ColaChaos beat the Old World pirates 2-0 in TDs and 8-2 in casualties with BullyCao being responsible for 7 of those injuries. So, professor, in light of these results, I wanted to ask if you thinks this the start of the chaos reign in the NUL?
- No.
- How can you be so sure, professor?
- Well, for first, NUL doesn't don't have any Lustrian teams this season, and Lustria is the only region where they have rain season. Most of the league's teams come from regions with temperate climate, so prolonged rain is not to be expected, and I'd estimate there being about 1 in 12 chance of rain in any match this season. And secondly, rain is chaotic by nature, there are so many outside factors that influence the rain fall - you know the old saying that a goblin's fart in Badlands could cause thundersorm in Kislev. That is the popularisation of the flatulance theory that has proved the chaotic nature of rain. So when you say "chaos rain" it sounds as stupid as "wet water" or " dumb troll".
- ... I stand corrected, professor. Let me ask you another question. Do you think that the chaos teams will do good in NUL this season?
- Hhmmm... That's is an interesting question. Chaos gods tend to be considered evil by common analysis, but they are also chaotic, so I'm guessing there is a chance that the chaotic randomness can cause some good by accident. But I think your getting too philosophical here, Gron. Let's stick to Blood Bowl! Very succesful week for the chaos sides, the two teams really showed the two different ways injuries and knock-outs can help you win the game. You can either target and take out the key player as the Science Fair did or try to go for indiscriminate mass extinction as the Colas.
- What about their opponents? Do you have any piece of insight for them?
- Inside from what?
- What?
- Well, I guess you're referring to the fact that most peas grow inside pods. But I'm not into farming, and I must confess that peas give me gas, so I wouldn't be growing peas if I was interested in farming.
- Yeeess.... Ahem, about the Pirate goblins, professor. Do you think that the little naval skills that the pirates have could be have some use on the Blood Bowl field?
- Oh, do the goblins have some special skills concerning belly buttons? Oh yes, I think some of them have navel piercings, yes... Didn't know that doing those required special skills, so I'm not really prepared to answer that thoroughly but I think that any extra knowledge about the abdominal region and piercing through navels could be used to cause extra hurt for opponents but that I think that it would require use of sharp instruments and those are banned from the field - not that they aren't used, of course. Players will try to smuggle in anything they find useful but the refs are quite good at spotting any dangerous instruments. But for example, who could forget the legendary halfling blocker Froddo "Baggs-em-in" Bilbo, the master of smuggling. He used to work as a jewelry liberator in the Marienburg markets and he used the skills acquired there quite succesfully. They still talk about that game where he smuggled in - in his person - knuckledusters for whole team, three daggers, iron anvil, three dozen chicken pies - he ate them all during the game, which I consider to be almost as impressive as the smuggling aspect - warhammer and an olifant! That must've been a sight.
- ...Thank you, professor, for that PIECE OF INSIGHT. Well, one match left and that would be the only draw of the round. 1 td and 1 casualty for both teams in the New Orc Gitz versus the Nattbowlarna matchup. How about it, professor, why didn't either of these teams manage to out-muscle the another one?
- What an apt figure of speech, Gron. Truly inspired, out-mussel! Yes, both offensive lines seemed tight as a clam, so defences had hard time trying to open them. I must say I started to worry that you had lost your mind with all the silly stuff you kept asking me but that genious of a metaphor shows that you just must've been kidding with me. Yes, in light of the numbers the level of blocking wasn't very good for either team. And both of the teams are more on the side of physical spectrum, so when neither team manages to get an upper-hand, this kind of result is to be expected. In fact, NUL does seem to be so physical this year, that these kinds of results may be quite common. Not a lot of finesse players out there, it does seem to be all about strength and armor this year!
- Thank you, professor, I fear that our time is running out. We'll be back later as we head into the second match week. Lot's of exiting games this week, and lots of physical play to be seen, as the professor said. Stay tuned folks, this has been Blood Sports Spotlight and I'm Gron Grumbundy, have a week!

--------
- J-R here folks, sorry for all the bad puns, but I woke up feeling punny and inspired today!
- HULK DON'T THINK PUNNY HUMAN IS FUNNY! HULK SMASH!
- No wait!
*SMASH*
- PUNY ADMIN


J-Reedy

Ouch... that hurt.

OK, Gnaar-man, time for another game on the sea! I'm off to a funny land with fjords next (or this, depenging when you read this) week, so only the early days work for me. CEST/GMT+2 as per normal:
- Monday any time after 12
- Tuesday any time
- Wednesday any time
- Thursday any time before 15

Let me know if any those times suits you, sir. If not, it'll have to be Monday 22nd.

Mr B

hehe, I love your work J-R!

So, Lars.
It's time to settle that this Snowy Whit Trashy thingy is not existing in NUL.
Show me your BEARD!
Not really sure about this week, Weekend should work and Thursday might be a good day if that fits your bag?
21 CEST, yes Swedish timing is the shit.  8)
Cya around mate!

equilibri

So, the most violent teams meat each other already, Luiggi!
Hopefully our armor holds better than goblins and skavens... :D

So, some suggestions:

Tue 16/9: 19:00->
Wed 17/9: 19:00->
Thu 18/9: 19:00->
Fri 19/9: 19:00->
Sat 20/9: 19:00->
Sun 21/9: 19:00->

As u can see I can play from 19:00 (Swedish time, of course...) from tuesday all the way to sunday! :D

Just tell me what works best for you!

Barmution

Kvasi and I hit it off early with some bashy action:


First half he put up an inspired defense and managed to sack my ball carrier and ultimately stopping my score after a tragic GFI accident. But after depriving him of a Guard BO in the 1st half, the strength advantage was mine in the 2nd  and when he failed to get Sharktopus down on 2 * 2D while he was adjacent to his carrier the damage was done. A lucky catch by a Chorf Blocker gave me the opportunity to waddle away with the ball and score the winning TD in the dying moments of the match.

GG Kvasi, it was a fun and exciting one up until late in the 2nd half.
Build a man a fire and you keep him warm for the night, set a man on fire and you keep him warm for the rest of his life.

Lars

Quote from: Mr B on September 14, 2014, 02:19:56 PM
hehe, I love your work J-R!

So, Lars.
It's time to settle that this Snowy Whit Trashy thingy is not existing in NUL.
Show me your BEARD!
Not really sure about this week, Weekend should work and Thursday might be a good day if that fits your bag?
21 CEST, yes Swedish timing is the shit.  8)
Cya around mate!

let go for Thursday @ 21:00

/Lars

tags

Quote from: Barmution on September 14, 2014, 04:37:04 PM
Kvasi and I hit it off early with some bashy action:


First half he put up an inspired defense and managed to sack my ball carrier and ultimately stopping my score after a tragic GFI accident. But after depriving him of a Guard BO in the 1st half, the strength advantage was mine in the 2nd  and when he failed to get Sharktopus down on 2 * 2D while he was adjacent to his carrier the damage was done. A lucky catch by a Chorf Blocker gave me the opportunity to waddle away with the ball and score the winning TD in the dying moments of the match.

GG Kvasi, it was a fun and exciting one up until late in the 2nd half.

GG, it was a fun one that could've gone either way for a while!

Gnaarkill

Quote from: J-Reedy on September 14, 2014, 12:42:16 PM
Ouch... that hurt.

OK, Gnaar-man, time for another game on the sea! I'm off to a funny land with fjords next (or this, depenging when you read this) week, so only the early days work for me. CEST/GMT+2 as per normal:
- Monday any time after 12
- Tuesday any time
- Wednesday any time
- Thursday any time before 15

Let me know if any those times suits you, sir. If not, it'll have to be Monday 22nd.

Nice! Yea ive heard about that land, funny people living there with a strange tounge.

Anyway, lets meet in the fjords! How about tuesday @20.00?

/Gnaarkill

J-Reedy

Quote from: Gnaarkill on September 15, 2014, 10:26:14 AM

Anyway, lets meet in the fjords! How about tuesday @20.00?

/Gnaarkill

That's a date, mate. See ya tomorrow at 20!

Luiggi

Quote from: equilibri on September 14, 2014, 04:25:41 PM
So, the most violent teams meat each other already, Luiggi!
Hopefully our armor holds better than goblins and skavens... :D

So, some suggestions:

Tue 16/9: 19:00->
Wed 17/9: 19:00->
Thu 18/9: 19:00->
Fri 19/9: 19:00->
Sat 20/9: 19:00->
Sun 21/9: 19:00->

As u can see I can play from 19:00 (Swedish time, of course...) from tuesday all the way to sunday! :D

Just tell me what works best for you!

Yeah, 8 casualtirs each in MD 1, this match has BLOODY written all over it.

Best for me will probably be Thursday or Friday, I will confirm during the week.

The Golden Arrow

So Müller, you get the opportunity to hit on my poor mangled team :P

My best day to play is on tonight and proabably on friday. I can also play daytime on saturday.

muller71

Quote from: The Golden Arrow on September 15, 2014, 03:38:00 PM
So Müller, you get the opportunity to hit on my poor mangled team :P

My best day to play is on tonight and proabably on friday. I can also play daytime on saturday.

Lets play tonight then. Starting at 20.00 CEST?

The Golden Arrow


Gnaarkill

Quote from: J-Reedy on September 15, 2014, 11:17:40 AM
Quote from: Gnaarkill on September 15, 2014, 10:26:14 AM

Anyway, lets meet in the fjords! How about tuesday @20.00?

/Gnaarkill

That's a date, mate. See ya tomorrow at 20!

Cool  8)
See you tonight, m8!

equilibri

Quote from: Luiggi on September 15, 2014, 03:01:11 PM
Quote from: equilibri on September 14, 2014, 04:25:41 PM
So, the most violent teams meat each other already, Luiggi!
Hopefully our armor holds better than goblins and skavens... :D

So, some suggestions:

Tue 16/9: 19:00->
Wed 17/9: 19:00->
Thu 18/9: 19:00->
Fri 19/9: 19:00->
Sat 20/9: 19:00->
Sun 21/9: 19:00->

As u can see I can play from 19:00 (Swedish time, of course...) from tuesday all the way to sunday! :D

Just tell me what works best for you!

Yeah, 8 casualtirs each in MD 1, this match has BLOODY written all over it.

Best for me will probably be Thursday or Friday, I will confirm during the week.

Sounds great!